May 28, 2014 The End.

It's not what you may think from the title! This morning is the beginning of the end of my Chemoherapy treatments. This is treatment number 6 of 6. This is a big day, while the apprehension and anxious feelings are there, the same as the first time, it feels so good to reach this point. Sorry for not posting sooner.

We, as a family has weathered it with flying colors. My daughter Rachel has been an absolute trooper. she never questioned the rules as far as contact and not being able to do certain things are concerned. She take it all in stride, goes with it and sees the silver lining. As an example due to PIC line inserted in my arm I am unable to go in our pool ( something we both enjoyed with each other ). she went in herself and suggested I just sit on the side and put my legs in......she said " this will be like your in here with me." What a kid!!!!

Vicki has been my shoulder to lean on, my therapy and the thorn in my side (of course in a good way). In the beginning she would listen to me talk about my fears, and hopes, and be the shoulder to lean on. When not able to do things around the house, she would  take over and get it done. Accompanying me to my treatments has been the best thing. Just having someone to talk to, someone to do the small things but most of all to be there and support. All this strength when I know that she is, on occasion, fighting her own emotions with MY disease. She is also the thorn by "reminding" me to do take care of myself, take my meds etc. Couldn't ask for a better thorn. Thank you for being there for me, thank you for being a shoulder to lean on and believe it or not thank you for being my thorn.

My friends and family have also been wonderful, offering well wishes and just plain questioning how things were going. The support is so greatly appreciated.

The staff at KGH have been incredible especially the nursing staff at the chemotherapy clinic. They are quite a group. The professionalism, and attentiveness show through all while being so friendly, upbeat and humorous, making the treatment regime as stress free and enjoyable for me and all their patients. Simply the best. They are a special breed.

While this is the end of my initial chemo therapy treatments, the next phase will prove to be more challenging. Within the next few weeks I will be prepping for a stem cell transplant procedure which will take place at Kingston General Hospital in July. After the procedure there will  be recovery time, the length of which is tough to estimate. This time will be challenging, but with the support of our family and friends, and each other,  wewill come out the other side.

This procedure, in a nutshell will mean harvesting my own stem cells, recieving a VERY high dose of Chemotherapy to kill any residual cancer cells and consequently kill my immune system. My own stem cells are then reinfused and begin to develop a  new immune system and put the cancer in remission. To say I am looking forward to it would be a bigger lie than that told by Bill Clinton! It will be tough, but it is all necessary in the long run. After the initial consult there was some question on if I should go through with it. There were questions about risk .....and the risk of infection is real and could be serious.....the reward and the procedure itself. After some thought, reflection and conversation with previous patients, there was no question....I had to do it, I had to have this procedure to get better, to prolong survival, for me and for my family. In the words of the immortal Larry the Cable Guy (for those of you who know who this is).."let's git er done".

I will blog and keep everyone updated as much as possible in the future.

Onward and Upward

Thank you all for reading and following.

Apr 4, 2014 UPDATE. Dance like nobody's watching!!

      It's been a while since my last post, to bring you up-to-date we are past the halfway point and so far everything is going according to plan. Today is the second day of part 4 and only two more to go.

      The results of a progress CT scan were very encouraging and described by my Dr. as an excellent response to the treatment regimen. It was good to hear this news to validate efforts so far of the medical team, my family team ,my friend team and of course myself.  It's all worth it.  There will be more trials and tribulations to come but we'll get through them.

      When all of this started, it was of course a shock, its was scary, it brought so much uncertainty.  You go to sleep thinking the worst, wake up thinking the worst, wondering why. What caused this and what could I have done different to prevent it......nothing. In my opinion nothing, we live our lives as we  do, and they turn out how they turn out....FATE. I believe in FATE. To analogize, we all have a number painted on our back and when that number is drawn there is absolutely nothing we can do.

       It is this idea that should make us see that it is so important to live our lives to the fullest everyday,  always eat your chocolate cake first, dance like nobody is watching and sing like nobody is listening.  Most will say I am not good at either but what do they know.

        Think about this and try singing along with you music even though you might not be able to carry a note in a bucket, or dance even though you know you have the dance skills of a moose. You my be surprised how it feels and how life's outlook changes.

            IF IT FEELS GOOD IN YOUR HEAD AND GOOD IN YOUR HEART DO IT!!!!!!!
   

February 7, 2013, Second Round

    Second day of a 2 day regime. Yesterday was fairly uneventful. Almost exactly 4 hours in duration...as scheduled. Felt very good for the remainder of the day. Slightly fatigued but nothing to be concerned about. Now the night was a different story. In keeping with tradition there was no sleep to be had (at least very minimal) this night, at least very minimal. This was the same thing after the first treatment. Was this the Chemo? Was it stress. Who knows.

    The no sleep problem has been resolved. It is caused by a pre treatment medication. apparently gets the body revved  up, and it takes some time to come back down. Could be the same thing tonight. All I can say is that the Home Shopping Network is on 24 hrs.......hide the credit card. LOL

DING DING DING : End of Round 2. Everyone back to their corners.

Feb 5, 2013 Take what we get!

In a pre chemo therapy appointment today, there was some good news. Now when I say good news, it was information from the doctor and it wasn't bad news. Through an exam he was unable to detect a lymph node that was enlarged and noted during my very first exam. Not spectacular......but we'll take it and run.

Chemo round 2 tomorrow. Hopefully the days after are as relatively uneventful as the first. Would it be believable to say that I'm kind of looking  forward to it? Well, in a strange way I am. It's another step in the journey, another step in getting well, and living life everyday.

Again I will have a spectacular partner by my side. Since day one we have always said we are in this together and we have.

 Thanks to everyone for your messages and well wishes.

Remember life is short so eat your chocolate cake first............anonymous

January 24, 2014

Well the decision has been made after a lot of thought and conversation. Today is my last day of work for at least 4 months. With the support of my great family and my work I decided the time was perfect for me to take the time off. It's going to be a strange transition. For 30 years I have been getting up every morning and going to work..not now. This will not be like a 2 week holiday. Now the only thing I have to do is keep the "honey do" list from getting out of control. This transition marks the beginning of another section in this new life we lead.

Throughout the last few weeks it has become quite apparent that not only have our lives changed but the outlook in general has changed. The little things don't seem so large...most daily chores we have no control over so don't even try. Don't sweat the small stuff....its all small stuff.

JANUARY 13, 2014

This is my first day back to work after the holidays. It would be another day where I would have to tell my co workers and my supervisor that I had cancer and what that may mean for them. They were of course shocked by the news but very supportive. There was a new course starting on Jan 20 and I was going to teach come hell or high water. I wanted to be part of it, to teach, to interact with students. All the things I have grown to enjoy.
During this week, I had several medical appointments and had to have someone fill in for me. Through conversations with my co workers and more importantly my wife the idea of taking some time away from work for me. To relax.

January 9

This was the second day of chemo treatments. This one was extremely uneventful and very short, thankfully. This was the end of the first round and still not sure and terrified how the coming days would transpire. Turns out the anticipated side effects are minor in nature. Just some fatigue. This lasted for about 5 to 6 days and then really it was back to normal. Felling good.....actually feeling great.

Jan 8, 2014 First go!!!

And so it all begins. The first of many chemotherapy treatments to come. this is where the rubber hit the road so to speak. The fight was about to begin in a big way. While I wanted to get things started, I think part of me was still in a state of denial, maybe it wasn't true, maybe there was a mistake. There would be no mistake. The drive to the hospital had to be the  longest most traffic congested drive of my life. Where just a month ago I would have been calm, with a "nothing I can do about it" attitude, this morning I was extremely on edge. I didn't want to be late for fear of losing my appointment time..I wanted to get this started.

This would turn into a very long day. We arrived at the chemo floor and was quickly shown to our chair. Did I mention that truthfully I still could not believe this was happening. The staff there was fantastic, after some routine checks, and medications the first course of two treatments was started and the fight was on. For the most part everything went well.

This is also the first time that I made the news public through a vague post on facebook, The response was over whelming. Well wishes from friends and from  across the country. This was truly a release, the heavy weight we had been carrying throughout Dec was off and it felt great.

This was also the night that I decided I would attend our weekly fire department training night and tel my family at the firehall what was happening. It was hard to tell but necessary. I knew that if I was to receive support and understanding from anyone it would be from these guy and girls. They are a great bunch and I am proud to be part of them.

This day ended looking forward to the short treatment tomorrow.

Dec 18, 2013 In the beginning!

Through this blog I will attempt to pass on as much information about my battle with cancer as I can possibly convey with text. While it is titled  My Cancer Journey, it is by no means all mine, I have a beautiful family to fight for , my wife and daughter. From them will come the inspiration and strength that I will require to carry on the fight.

This is the day mine and my family's lives changed forever. This is the day I was officially handed my diagnoses of cancer. Cancer...a word that strikes fear into everyone, and we were no different, we tried to listen to the explanations of type , treatments, and the big plan to try and beat this monster. There was no way to take it all in, there was so much information, paperwork, and facility tours.

We couldn't believe it, was this really happening to our family? Was it a bad dream? It was neither, it was our new reality. Emotions were high, tears were shed, and for quite a bit there was nothing but silence. Silence because of not knowing what say. Just alone with our own thoughts.

This was exactly a week before Christmas, we decided to keep this information from everyone except for immediate family so we didn't have to deliver news such as this to close friends directly before Christmas.

Christmas for us this year was not the usual, yes of course there was Christmas trees, lights and lots of presents, it was a little low keyed. There were more important things to think about, basically what was to come. How our lives would change. The unknowns.